My Journey to Embracing the Abaya
Growing up in Britain as a young Muslim woman hasn’t always been easy. From a young age, I felt caught between two worlds—the Western culture around me and the traditions and beliefs that defined my home life. It was confusing at times, especially when it came to expressing myself through fashion. I wanted to fit in, to look like the girls at school and feel “normal,” but deep down, I struggled with the idea of who I was and where I truly belonged.
For years, I tried to blend in, wearing jeans, hoodies, and the latest trends, thinking that this would make me more accepted. But no matter what I wore or how I acted, there was always a part of me that felt out of place. The disconnect between my external appearance and my internal beliefs slowly became harder to ignore. I started to realise that I wasn’t being true to myself. That realisation was the beginning of my journey towards understanding and accepting my identity.
Growing Closer to My Faith
About three years ago, I started getting more serious about my faith. I began to pray regularly and reflect on what Islam meant to me personally, not just as something I was born into. Part of this process was rethinking how I presented myself, and that’s when I started considering wearing an abaya. But honestly, at first, I was terrified.
The thought of wearing an abaya in public made me anxious. Would people stare at me? Would they judge me? I wasn’t used to standing out in that way, and the last thing I wanted was more attention. On top of that, I’d always thought abayas were only for older women or something you wear on religious occasions—not an everyday thing for a young woman like me who grew up in a Western society.
Taking the First Step
Despite my fears, I decided to give it a try. I started small, choosing a simple black abaya, thinking I could ease into it. The first time I wore it outside, I felt exposed—not because the abaya was revealing, but because I suddenly felt very visible. It was like a spotlight had been turned on, and I wasn’t sure how to handle it. I kept fidgeting with the fabric, feeling like it was awkward and heavy, constantly worrying about how people might perceive me. I was so self-conscious that I almost gave up after that first day.
But something kept pushing me forward. I began wearing the abaya more frequently, trying to push past the discomfort. Little by little, I started to realise something: the abaya wasn’t just a piece of clothing. It was a reflection of my faith, my values, and the person I was becoming. With time, I noticed that wearing it actually made me feel more comfortable, not less.
Discovering Style and Confidence
One of the biggest shifts for me was realising that the abaya didn’t have to be this shapeless, plain garment that I once thought it was. I began exploring different styles and cuts, finding ones that fit well and felt good on me. I discovered that abayas can be stylish and beautiful, with elegant designs that reflect personality and taste. They don’t have to hide your frame or make you feel like you’re covering up who you are. Instead, they can enhance your confidence, allowing you to be modest and still feel put together.
As I wore the abaya more often, I noticed a change in how people treated me. It was subtle at first, but soon, I realised that people were showing me more respect. In public spaces, strangers were more polite, and there was a certain distance they kept that felt like they were honouring my space and presence. It was different from the superficial compliments I’d received when I dressed in more Western fashion. Instead of “You look nice today,” I felt an underlying sense of respect, which boosted my confidence in a way I hadn’t expected.
Respect and Acceptance
Even my friends, who were used to seeing me in jeans and T-shirts, started noticing the change. At first, they were curious, asking why I had decided to wear the abaya. But soon, they saw that it was more than just a style choice for me—it was about embracing who I am. The compliments followed, of course, and as a young woman who has had her share of insecurities, I appreciated them. But what mattered more was that my friends respected my decision. It wasn’t just about how I looked; it was about the strength and conviction behind my choice.
Looking to the Future
Now, when I look back, I’m so grateful for how this journey has shaped me. Wearing an abaya has become a core part of my identity—not just a symbol of my faith, but of the confidence I’ve found in being true to myself. The respect that came from others wasn’t just validation, but a reflection of the respect I had learned to give myself. And as I continue to grow in my faith and self-acceptance, I know that this choice isn’t just about today. It’s about the future and the kind of woman I want to be.
When it comes to my favourite place to get my abayas, recently I have turned to AZAARYA for their quality and styles. Here are 3 of my favourites!
Hania Black Abaya
It’s an open abaya, really comfortable and so stylish and versatile, I wore this to University a lot, I usually wear a white slip dress underneath and sometimes open the front for a contrasted look. It comes with the black hijab.
Melina Mint Green Abaya
This comes with the slip dress and hijab too, and it’s a little bit more formal but still very comfortable, it’s designed as an open abaya, it does have a gold brooch like fastener but really it’s one for slightly warmer weather or indoors – but so pretty!
Zoya Black corduroy Abaya
This is so classy! I wore this to an evening out with our course friends, it comes with a slip dress and hijab too. It’s subtle but still blingy enough! My non muslim friend liked this so much she asked where it was from and has ordered one too.